The Story of the Three Cousins

Once upon a Tuesday, three cousins from far away lands arrived on the doorstep of Casa de Dobby. They had traveled for hours days by a Toyota-drawn carriage from the villages of Sin City Adjacent and Spuds’n’Snow.

The cousins were famished and insisted on driving journeying into the nearby Swedish village for some authentic Mexican Swedish food. Along the way they made sure to practice their best Swedish accents so as to fit in among the locals.

Dinner was served, and the three cousins were disappointed that they did not get to use their fabulous Swedish accents once during dinner.

After the three cousins and the familia de Dobby finished their plates and washed down their meal with soda and tea wine from their goblets, the two youngest members of the group decided that the night was not complete without ice cream porridge. They led the procession down the block cobblestone street to the local ice cream porridge shop, where everyone ate their delicious ice cream porridge and visited in the air-conditioned ice-cream open-air shop.

Stories were told of adventures to foreign lands where penguins marched dragons were slain and icebergs didn’t sink the ship.

Then the cousins took the youngest of the Casa de Dobby hostage and forced her to listen to their Swedish impressions as they searched in vain for the elusive Dala Horse on which to sit and take a picture ride.

Insults stones were thrown at her when she ashamedly realized (after having led the Toyota-drawn carriage up and down the street several times) that the legendary Dala Horse must have been recently removed from the Swedish village (along with its reputation for hosting a marvelous festival each year in the park).

Luckily she remembered that there was a big wooden handsome Viking who lived on a street corner. She told the cousins that he loved to have his picture taken talk to people with fake Swedish accents, and so the cousins readily agreed that the Viking was an excellent replacement for the missing Dala Horse.

The next morning, Amberella (she’s not a stripper, people; get you’re minds out of the gutter) slaved over the hot oven fire all morning to assemble the perfect breakfast feast for the visitors.

Amberella made Mini Quiche Biscuits, two of which were eggless and cheeseless (also known as plain biscuits). These were for her sister, Belle, who arrived by Honda horse late Tuesday night.

After the breakfast feast, Dobby, the spoiled puppy High King of these lands, was placed on his throne and admired by all until it was time for the three cousins to journey home to Sin City Adjacent and Spuds’n’Snow.

A wondrous time was had by all, and with tearful good-byes and promises of future visits, the Toyota-drawn carriage drove off into the polluted hazy afternoon sun.

……….

Extra credit to anyone who just read all of that.